and then she started living...her fabulous life

Rather than hoping for better, I've stopped having expectations out of my life. Rigid ones anyway. It seems it only becomes worth living when you stop letting it disappoint you by placing standards and guidelines that you couldn't possibly control. When you finally give up, relinquish control and let the adventure unfold, it becomes fabulous.

Fabulous can mean a lot of things but for me it meant allowing the good things to feel good. Anything. If it felt good, I would bask in it. It didn't matter what it was or what it meant or if it was on time or enough. Just taking it all in. And for people, it meant taking time to figure out who I was first...and then seeing how everyone else fits into my world. Taking a break from trying to fit into theirs. Or any other crazy prediction of a life I believed I should be living. Doing this feels like breathing when this whole entire time I was sucking through a stir stick at Coffee Bean, trying so hard to get more.